I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
