she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
