This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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