I wanna passion pit in your ass
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize