Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
that is very illegal...i love you.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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