Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Welp...herpes.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
