So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
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