What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize