we're blogging at a bar
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
