Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
