Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
