evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize