Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
