You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I will pee on everything he values.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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