Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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