ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Actions speak louder than pants.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
