Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize