If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
The beer is more important than you right now.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
