I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
