my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
