ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
