no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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