yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
