South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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