So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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