Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i used baking grease as lip gloss
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
