If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
