Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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