from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
