porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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