Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
