I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
