Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
