I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
