Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
