If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Randomize
