Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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