Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
