so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
