No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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