In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
