I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
