I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
