I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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