The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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