Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize