Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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