So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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