Small penises have feelings too.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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