okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
